since everything that happened last year I haven’t been close to anyone new, or any of the people I was close to.
It’s not that I can’t, in fact I’m more open now than I ever was in the past, but it’s that I have no desire to.
I haven’t met anyone new that seemed like anyone I wanted to get to know. I don’t mean it in a condesending manner, just that I live presently in a small rural town and I encounter a lot of the same people. Next year I’m going to college, and I don’t know how it’ll go. I don’t feel it’ll be any amazing transformation. I intend to learn and do well in hopes of getting a decent education and career. I don’t party. I don’t want to party. I don’t see any benefit to staying up late for the hell of it.
I have been socially inept…virtually forever, but I have always been at a spot in my life as far as desires and priorities that is roughly five+ years of my age group.
the last man I really connected with had similar views and we clicked very well, but he later revealed when he had said he was in hid mid twenties he meant early 30s. creeper.
It’s strange I thought I would always need to have a close realtionship with someone to be happy, but I’m much more content without them. I’m a very solitary person, and to say that is almost unacceptable. All of a sudden if you say you enjoy being alone you’re weird, creepy, loser.
bleck. just throwing it out there. Nothing of much importance said here. no poems, but new ones are being added to my collection.
until next time
-chrish
1 response so far ↓
coldfire // January 11, 2008 at 2:26 am
Good thoughts.
I like to be alone as well sometimes, but I also like being with people.
I think I am just content either way.